Thursday, February 19, 2009

football story

The ball was kicked, the crowd was rawring for my Dad to return the ball. Unfortunately he couldn’t run fast enough and was taken down by some big guy with the number 65 on his jersey. Almost in tears my mom reassured me that he would be fine. Even at the age of 8 I knew that the clock was counting down and being down by 6 points wasn‘t exactly the best situation. “Come on dad!!!” I yelled with great enthusiasm, knowing that everyone there, painted in gold and maroon was there, cheering for my dad, just like me. “Hike!” The clock started again. Utterly confused, I kept my attention drawn to number 23. The ball was heaved across the field, but fell short of a different receiver. Again the same play, except this time the ball was almost picked off by the other team. I felt desperate, not able to give any support except with my cheers, that seemed to be overwhelmed and drowned out by the crowd. It was third down, something had to happen, or else the season with be over with a loss. “Hike!” the quarterback yelled again. The ball was thrown into the air, headed directly for my father. I could barely watch as the ball touched his hands. After that I couldn’t believe my eyes as he took off down the field, his legs were moving so fast I thought they would have to fall off pretty soon. The bad man chasing after my dad was also moving really fast, too fast, oh no. Just before he could catch my dad it was over, touchdown.

3 comments:

  1. I really enjoyed reading your blog. I like how you build up the excitement. Great job of keeping your reader's attention! I kind of wanted to know more about what was going on.
    Out of curiosity, did your dad really play for ASU?

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  2. Hey Blake,

    Great story, exciting and it kept me reading the whole time with intrigue. I left wanted to know more; I wanted more insight from a third person or yourself. You were young so I can understand why you wouldn’t fully understand. This was a great moment in time and well written. My only other comment is there was a simple grammatical error nothing big at all. Overall great story.
    Mercedes

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  3. I caught one mistake in the sentence, "It was third down, something had to happen, or else the season with be over with a loss." I think you ment or else the season would be over with a loss.
    Other than that it was great. I felt as of i was in the stands with you cheering for your dad. You used very descriptive sensory. The fans’ "painted in maroon and gold" was a great touch.
    I can't wait for more...

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